Facing Up To It
I got to face up to e reality tat it is longer there. A brand new Ox Yr is jus rite at doorstep. I got to keep moving n not b affected by e nitty gritty things tat is goin on ard me. To b recognised n make frens whom r true to u doesnt come easy.

With e new yr ahead, letting go of everythin seems to b e best. Tat includes e wish I hope for...since e dae I saw u half a yr ago. E little acts along e way...I wasnt blind. I did take note of them. I wondered if I was too sensitive. I never wanna end up like sumone else...being e subject tat bonds pple as everyone dislikes. I feel as if I am fallin into e same category. Soon...
Still....all I wanna sae is... A VERI BIG THANK YOU! For e help u hav render me n e ear u lend me to listen to my frustrations.

PS: Pardon me for e inherent flow of tots. I doubt he will ever get to read tis.

I Lost It
As much as I hate to admit it, I guess I lost it.
Y is there so little faith tat I can hav in myself?
Does e responses on msn matters so much?
I'm tired of e occasionally ups n occasionally downs I am gettin.
IF I am to take it easily,
I noe it means tat I cant b bothered anymore.
I dun wanna head tat direction.

I am tired.
If it is not meant to b, pls let me give up peacefully.
Dun give me any false hopes any further.

Politics
It is interesting n funny how we human like to create problems for ourselves. We do often hear pple ard us 'complain' abt how troubled they r wif their life. Yet, there are pple out there who loves to deal wif Politics. One of the most problematic type of human relationship problem. I, myself, seriously do not understand y. Life itself does not offer enoff problems for u? Has life make u feel tat it is dull n boring? In my opinion, I dun tink so. In fact, there are too many problems for me tackle in my daily life. One of them is being too emotionless. :(

Wat if ur life is problem free? Would life bcome dull n boring? Would u try to make it interesting by creating problems for urself? Or would u try to work on other stuff? If it is me, I would choose to work on other stuff to make myself a better person.

Sum pple ard me r obsessed wif e politics goin ard. Oh well, to me, it jus dun bother me. All I wanna is a proper lookin degree which is often referred as e 'toilet paper'. Of cos, I would hope to look for sumone who is suitable for me to spend my life wif. I guess I hav passed tat age. Gosh...I cant believe how fast I am aging mentally. Tis is real bad.

Shall pen off here...off to sleep. Stay tune...I'll b back!

本小姐的大日子!
There is onli 2 words to describe my mood now. "SHAG" & "HAPPY". I am so physically drained tat I am gettin emotionless. Opps. 2 consecutive daes of celebration makes me feel tat birthdae is a BIG event in my life. It has never been celebrated so much in e past. Not even my 21st. I hope it will continue to b like tat as I aged. Heres e recount of wat happened for e past 2 daes... (I promise u wont see such entries on other daes! I jus wanna write down wat I can remember wat I did for my birthdae. Jus pardon me for e time being.)

Day 1

JB trip wif Crazy, Joo & Cutie (I still hate to call her tat! :P). It was a celebration for both of our birthdaes...Joo n ME! We r jus 2 daes apart! :) Went for lunch first @ Sushi King @ City Square. It wasnt reali fantastic. I was pretty disappointed wif their salmon n cha soba. After lunch, went ard shoppin for mum's bag. She has been pestering me abt helpin her to get a bag. After getting e bag, we decided to catch a movie together. The Diary Of The Dead. It is not yet been released in Singapore. E movie was pretty scary n e ending is sickening. It is veri much like Quarantine. If u hav caught tat movie, u would understand wat I meant by everything is captured using a videocam n e screen is SHAKY! When e movie ended, we din even noe tat it has ended until we saw e reminder abt leaving ur belongings behind! Goodness. All of us dun understand e ending. E smart aleck me even made a joke out of it. As usual. It was totally embarrassing.

As we hav sum time left while waiting for e movie, we went ard for more shopping. We went into Chamelon where I made quite a big damage to my pocket. 50 ringgit in a matter of 30 mins?! :P After tat, we decided to take a break by dropping by an ice cream cafe. It has a concept like Ben & Jerry. We had ice creams n took sum photos. Soon, it was time to head for e movie. Shortly after e movie, we headed towards Joo's place. Took a cab which onli cost us 15 ringgit. It was reali cheap. I bet u wont find such a pricing in Singapore.

At Joo's place, we were busy playin wif her cute little puppy, Lucky. Hang ard abit n slack abit b4 we head off for our dinner @ e Zi Cha near her place. E food was not bad. We decided to head back to her place n slack a little longer b4 comin back to Singapore.

Oh boy...e whole journey back home is reali long n tiring. I hav no idea how Joo manage to travel to skool on time for e 8am lecture when we were still in NP. It was truly madness. 我真的很佩服你!

Day 2

Ice Skating wif e uni peeps. Met @ Kallang @ 11am. Goodness...I was reali tired then. Reached @ 11.05am onli to noe tat everyone has reached n I was e onli one late. =X Jus e 4 of us @ first as one of e gals was givin music lessons. Walked to e nearby bus stop to travel to Kallang Leisure Park. Guess wat? E bus left rite in front of us b4 we could even try to wave to e bus driver! DAMN! Was waitin @ e bus stop n deeply engross in our conversation on Taiwan. To our surprise, 4 of us n none of us noticed tat e shuttle bus came n it left rite in front of us AGAIN! LOL! It was totally unbelievable! Soon, e bus came and we cam-whore on e bus. :)

Reached Kallang Leisure Park n was told tat we r goin to shop for my present. Being e super indecisive n boring me, I absolutely hav no idea wat to get. Was walkin ard n visited e pet shop. Mr Muscle was feelin hungry and we all stopped over @ a shop while we all got ourselves sum food. I bought a spring roll n we found a seat @ e first level of e shopping mall. Spent some time for more cam-whoring near e cinema while we wait for 1pm to arrive to get into e ice skating ring. Soon, it was 1pm n our music teacher arrives too! We all got ready to get in there to skate...bought e tickets n went rite in.

It is my 2nd time ice skating. When I first got in, I was practically clinging onto e sides of e ring. BAD bad bad...time flies while I struggled to learn to balance n skate. Everyone learned real fast. To speak e truth, e birthdae gal was e slowest! :S Totally embarrassing. Fell a few times. Felt a little lonely n fed up wif myself for being such a slow learner among them. GRR! I couldnt n dare not join e rest in e middle of e ring. Was skating round n round n round... Scary little cat.

Soon, it was time to leave...but Mr Muscle left first for his other gathering. Stupid me n blur Mr Muscle made a mistake. I reali shldnt hav passed him e entry tickets as they would need them back when we leave. Blur Mr Muscle tot he passed e tickets to me. Hence, he left happily thinking tat e tickets r wif me. Only to realise when I called him again...they r all with him n he had oredi travelled to MRT station! Mr Muscle had no choice but to make an additional trip to pass us e tickets as our other fren was stopped in e shop. I felt so bad makin him havin to come back all e way to pass us the tickets.

Then, we were all hungry frm e ice-skating. We all took e escalator up to e top floor to hav Jap Buffet. It was fabulous! E salmon sashimi was so fresh! I hav a great time 'whackin' those Jap dishes. :) Played Zhong Ji Mi Ma while we tried our best to finish up e leftovers.

After lunch cum dinner, we went to PS to shop for my pressie. Got myself a Hugo Boss Woman Perfume. We went round shoppin a little bit more b4 heading home. :)

Shall stop here....gonna prepare for skool. (updated on 9 Jan)

2009
2009, a brand new year ahead of me. Past resolutions made for 2008 wasnt fulfilled entirely. I did manage to revive in keepin in contact wif several frens mentioned back then. Caught up wif several of them thru my birthdae n sum small gatherings held thruout e yr. Thanks for givin me e opportunity to find back wat I lost to time. :)

For e yr ahead, 2009...

1. STILL try my best to b a good daughter.
2. FOCUS! Sumting which I fail terribly in.
3. Gonna do better in my studies.
4. STILL...try my best to squeeze out sum time despite my tight schedule to catch up wif my long lost frens.

Oh well...it was jus yesterdae tat I was still sulking away over sum issues. It was another few hrs ago tat I started smiling to myself. Life is ever so unpredictable. I hav no idea when is e next time I will b sulkin or smiling to myself again. One thing for sure, my weeks ahead will be packed like sardines once again. Skool & my 3 students r waiting for me to attend to them. Mon - Sun, 7 daes a week, there isnt a single dae which I do not need to do anything abt e 2 things mentioned above. It may seems overwhelming to me now but I am pretty sure life will b ever so fulfilling n filled wif many more joyous things to look forward to. Esp. my attractive pay @ e end of e month. *grins*

Expectations. Is expectations e mother of all disappointments?! I would hav to agree. If I wasnt expecting anythin to happen jus 2 daes ago, I wouldnt b so upset n b sulkin my time away. It was purely due to the fact tat I am expecting a cheerful reply. However, wat exactly took place was veri much different frm my expectations. I was expecting to b out. Still, end of 2008 was veri much e same like every other yr. Disappointment sets in n I was almost in tears. If I hav expect myself to spend it like any other yr, I wont b feelin anythin. I am glad to hav J comin forward to tok to me. He alwaes appears @ e rite timing. It is esp. so when I am feelin so vulnerable. Thanks for cheering me up as alwaes. It did meant alot to me. :) (though I noe he wont b readin tis...still...I wanna credit him for tat)

Hence, e expectations I hav for myself will remain as high as possible. As for e others ard me, I would like to keep it as low as possible. Tis is to prevent me frm feelin disappointed ever again. :)

PS: Been a long time since I last blog in such a way.