傻
固执又天真的我一直认为你会跟其他人不一样。
经过这阵子的细心观察， 我告诉自己这次应该不会错了。
我一再认为我学聪明了。不再是那位又天真又傻乎乎的小妹妹。我长大了！
看来，我太高估了我自己。
你证明了。 你不是与众不同的。我看错了你。

天底下的乌鸦一般黑。
这个道理我早就应该明白。

算了。我累了。

Losing e Ability
Am I losing e ability to communicate? Or am I jus pms-ing? Deep within me, there is an urge to reach out to e pple ard me. However, I am jus moodless to open my heart n mouth to communicate. Worst still, I find myself seems to b left out in e many 'secrets' goin ard. Whenever there is a conversation goin on, I am totally blur or unclear abt wat is goin on. It seems like I am livin in my own world while others live in theirs. Detached. Tats e word.

Or issit e act of over sensitive n lack of confidence which is e cause of all these? Wats wrong?! Perhaps...academic performance do hav a bigger impact on me than I tot. I guess I am better off being left alone to rebuild my confidence n find time to calm myself down. It wont b easy n I will take quite sum time to rebuild it back.

Sum harmless comments in life were never supposed to b take it to heart. Yet, at times, I took it way too seriously n took all e 'blame' on myself. Oh well, I do need to learn to let it in frm one ear n let it out frm e other. In short, I am jus way too conscious abt my weakness for my own good.

Be strong n cover up all those weakness in u as u wont want ur competitors to see them.

Competition. Y is e competition so strong? After one left, comes along another. A test for me? I tink I tried real hard e previous time. Tat was my max. Wat abt now? Let time do e tokin...

If it is meant to be... It will be.

My Bestie
It is amazing how I will never run out of topics tokin to YW. Its truly even more amazing how my perspective of certain issues in my life changes over tat few hrs of conversation. I can never explain how much "wisdom" or knowledge I can get jus thru e simple conversation wif her. It is always refreshin to b able to tok to her. To me, she is jus like a little map or compass in my life. Despite e fact tat I am supposedly to b older than her for a few months, she always seem to b e big sister who is ever there to guide me when I am lost or feelin confused over nitty gritty things. I am reali thankful to hav her in my life n treasure tis frenship whereby I could jus trash out all e "shits" inside me. On top of all tat is mentioned above, e best part of our frenship is e common understandin, chemistry, common 'tactics', similar interest n values towards life in general. I cant believe tat we can strike such a common understanding towards certain aspects of our life. All these similarities onli serves to make our conversation n relationship to b ever so enriching, precious n close to my heart. :)

E onli upsetting thing is... YW is a GAL. If onli... SHE IS A GUY INSTEAD! I would hav married her regardless of e lack of a diamond ring. I guess I hav repeated tis quite a few times! Still, I cant help hopin n feelin tat it would b reali great to hav her as my husband.

It was jus a 6hrs chat which took a huge change in my perspective towards several pple in my life. I cant help feeling tat I hav overlook over certain little things in my life. To b veri truthful, I am a little disappointed wif myself as I hav alwaes tot I am careful enoff tis time round. In actual fact, I am still not TAT careful n smart enoff. Oh wells...to treat myself slightly better by havin lesser expectations for myself, I can onli console myself tat everyone do make mistakes n hav their low times in life. :)

Gal...if u r readin tis, I would like to thank u for helpin me remove those "dusty particles" which has been cloggin ard my eyes for e past few months. I promise tat I will TRY MY BEST not to think too much n take my time to reassess e whole situation again b4 takin a plunge to b e "hopeless person" once again. :) I hav alwaes enjoyed ur company...

Puzzling
Too many things had taken place within a short span of these few weeks. Life has its ups n downs. I am still feelin puzzled. ?_? I guess my patience is being put to test for tis time round. I reali wonder when will I be more clear abt wat is goin on. Am I right? Did I assess e situation correctly? Or am I wrong? *pulls hair*

Oh well, many unanswered qns revolves ard my mind. I guess e strategy of tryin to b "aloof" on e surface is not workin anymore. I got to show more care & concern. Yet, @ e same time, I am afraid tat things would not turn out e way I wanna it. Puzzled...???...

Alrite, enough of my blabbering... Till then, see ya.

Totally Frustrating!
I cant believe how stupid + careless + brainless I can get with Accounting! It is a reali a PAIN in my ass! *screams* *jumps up n down* AHHHHHHHHH...

Alrite...I will b back to tackle n kill u chapter 4! Jus u watch n see...

PS: ignore e crap above...I jus need to rant. Thanks.

Love? Relationships?
Recently, people ard me r plagued with relationship problems. I tried my best to cheer them up and seeing them in such a distress state never fails to make me wonder if being single is a better option. Time and again, listening to these endless relationship stories, it makes me feel tat being in a relationship with another person of e opp. gender requires alot out of oneself. "I want to b single" this phrase has been on my mind for some time. It amazed me a little as I hav alwaes wanted to hav a taste of wats being in a relationship is like. Tis curiosity din die off over time. My desire to know more n understand onli gets stronger over time. So, wat hav cause tis sudden change in me? Did my status becomes "In a Relationship" over nite which brings abt tis change? No? Sad to sae, there isnt any guy outta who wanna me as his gf yet. Hence, I am still Single. To b exact, e real culprit who cause tis change is none other than makin a point to use my heart instead of my brain to understand wat my peers r goin thru. It makes me feel for them, care for them n feel worried for them. At bad times, I had e urge to even cry for them.

In conclusion, being single rox my socks! :)

True understanding is using ur heart to feel for e person...not ur brains with logical tinking.
Know me for who I am...not who u wanna me to b.

2 More + Puzzled...
It was my 1st paper after 1 yr of not skooling. Nervous + poor time management leaves me feelin jittery over my paper. Confusion + inconfident nearly ate me up totally. I had no idea if I ever wrote out of point and if wat I wrote is relevant to e qn asked. Half of e time, I was feeling weird & confused & irritated with my turtle speed of writting. To make things worst, I hav no idea if I was rite as e ans has no boundaries. It is jus plain argumentative short essay qns. 3 hrs of endless writting got me all tensed up and my body was aching reali veri badly. As of current, I am still at e mercy of my spine aching. Every little movement which involves e spine hurts! Oh wells...there isnt much to b worrying abt. Cos I hav gave my best n muscle aches should b subsiding over e next few daes. Lets hope it does as it is torturing me like mad.

E fruits of 2 consecutive daes of studying together will be revealed on e 4 Dec. It was an enjoyable experience for me to be able to learn from them n understand wat r e main points to keep a lookout for. I am reali appreciative of wat I get to learn from them. :) THANKS!

On e other hand, it made me a little confused over myself. I find it hard to accept n understand myself. Self deception is a scary thing. When reality hits, it sweeps u off ur feet like u hav never experience it before. No worries, I will b back soon n these confusions can all go home & fly kite! :) Give me a little time...

Broken english is result of Mr Brain taking an off dae! :P